A couple of years ago I went through a really painful transition in my life. Through that time, I found my voice through writing, therapy, and doing a lot of emotional work. The intent of this blog is to share some of my writing with the hope that it might resonate with some of you.
If I can contribute some emotional vulnerability, light, understanding or all of the above, to this world, then this blog will be worth it.
This post I actually wrote a few months ago. I was looking back on how far I've come spiritually and emotionally just within the past year and a half. These were my thoughts on transition, change, and resilience. I hope you enjoy.
So, let's talk about growth. No one can control their own circumstances for growth. It's best that we get that fact out of the way now. Throughout my life, I have found that we can maybe control two things, those being our own happiness and our own choices. We can either come to that realization with anxiety or relief. Anxiety would tell us to freak out, that we are so small and insignificant in this world that we can be swept in any direction the cruel, apathetic winds of the universe blow us. That we have no choice, no autonomy, and therefore no purpose.
Heavy shit, right?
But wait, there is another option, that being meeting that realization with relief. It is not my responsibility to create these circumstances for growth, because the universe does that for me. And a lot of the time, those circumstances are painful, uncomfortable and even lonely. So, personally, I'm glad that it isn't my job because I don't know if I could bring myself to break what needed to be broken. I might have allowed myself to remain stuck in a toxic relationship, continuously chipping away at my vision and goals, making them smaller, more "realistic". I might have continued to deny myself the growth I needed to access once again my divine light out of fear of pain or change.
Like I said, this growth stuff is painful, uncomfortable, and often lonely. Self-realization often happens after something jolts us awake, and it's not always pretty. So I am glad that we are not always in charge of inflicting that on ourselves, because many of us (myself included) wouldn't be able to do it.
But here we are, still standing.
Still courageous enough to wake up, show up, and still give a shit. And when we think back to the times we sobbed and begged for our lives to go back to the way they were, thought that we might not survive our lives being shattered into pieces, we are able to look back and realize just how resilient we are. We say thank you to those circumstances that jolted us awake, to the trauma, and to the universe for breaking what needed to be broken, so that we can be free. So that we can access our power, our light, even ourselves.
Because love, peace, and abundance already exist within us. We just have to be bold enough to claim it for ourselves.
Comentarios